1) BRAIN TUMOR:
Doctor: I regret to tell you that
you have a brain tumor.
Mr. Bea n: Yesss!!!
(jumps in joy)
Doctor: Did you understand what
I just told you?
Mr. Bea n: Yes of course, do you
think I'm dumb?
Doctor: Then why are you
Mr. Bea n: Because that proves
that I have a brain!
2) MR. BEAN WHILE IN GRADE SCHOOL:
Teacher: What is 5 plus 4?
Mr. Bea n: 9
Teacher: What is 4 plus 5?
Mr. Bea n: Are you trying to fool me,
you've just twisted the figure,
the answer is 6!!
3) WHILE IN A DRUG STORE:
Mr. Bea n: I'd like some vitamins
for my grandson.
Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C?
Mr. Bea n: Any will do, my grandson
doesn't know the alphabet yet!!
4) AT AN ATM MACHINE:
Friend: What are you looking at?
Mr. Bea n: I know your PIN no.,
Friend: Alright, what is my PIN no.
if you saw it?
Mr. Bea n: four asterisks (****)!
Friend: How many women do you
believe must a man marry?
Mr. Bea n: 16
Mr. Bea n: Because the priest says 4 richer,
4 poorer, 4 better and 4worse.
6) CHATTING WITH HIS FRIEND:
Friend: How was the tape you borrowed
from me, is it Ok?
Mr. Bea n: What do you mean ok,
I thought it's a horror film.
I didn't see any picture.
Friend: What tape did you took anyway?
Mr. Bea n: Head Cleaner.
7)DEATH OF HIS MOTHER:
Mr. Bea n:(crying) the doctor called,
Mom's dead. Friend: condolence, my friend. (After 2 minutes) Mr. Bea n cries even louder Friend: what now? Mr. Bea n: my sister just called,
her mom died too!
8) MR. BEAN ATTENDING A MEETING:
Colleague: Sorry I'm late.
I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hrs
because of a power failure.
Mr. Bea n: That's alright, me too..
I got stuck on the escalator for 3 hrs.
9) Spelling lesson:
Mr. Bea n's Son: Dad, what is the
spelling of successful.. ..is it one c or two c?
Mr. Bea n: Make it three c to be sure!